What to blog about?

It’s been a while and I’ve had some complaints about not updating :-D
So here I am…. Strumming my fingers ….
(P.S – I wrote this yesterday before I wrote Happy Holidays which for some reason I’ve posted up first)

I had sooo many ideas initially but now I’m stuck. Ok I’m going to try and write whatever comes to my head. I had an idea about my Christmas parties but that seems slightly played out. I can tell you however that at one of them, the office lothario (who btw is nicely married with a young son) made a very obvious pass at me. He kept trying to get all in my space and was always trying to dance with me. At one point when I was at the bar, he comes up and offers me his lolly. Pulled it from his mouth. The lolly he had been sucking on avidly. I was very amused – that has to be the cheesiest pick up ever. J And no I don’t share lollies.

Ok back to strumming my fingers ….
My head/scalp broke out in sores the other day. Like I had left relaxer in it for too long or something. Unlike my silly cousin suggested, I don’t have lice! I have now been walking around for the last 3 days with hair like a disused straw mop. Not sexy. I however did look sexy on Saturday night. I went to a party. And I wore a BRIGHT RED dress – in a sea of people in muted colours. VERY SEXY :-D
The only thing sexier was birthday boy with his new girlfriend. It was soo cute seeing them together as a couple for the first time as he was soo obviously proud of her, and she of him.

It seems everyone is hooking up. It is winter I guess. People either have lovers coming over from out of town, or have collected new boyfriends. I’m not hating but damn its cold! It doesn’t help that over the weekend, I saw “my lover” and “Kane”. Don’t worry, I didn’t feel any pangs or any emotion but again, damn IT’S COLD!!! It’s like a cold snap has descended. It’s freezing, it’s misty, it’s clammy and it’s damn foggy to boot! (There is no visibility when driving. They had better not ground my plane). It’s generally not conducive for anything other than lying in bed with another warm human body, generating some extra heat.

My mother hasn’t done anything extra annoying but she has started getting into Little Miss Jocelyn and sadly enough seems to have forgotten she’s a fifty-something year old woman. She’s started copying the expressions. One time, I was correcting something she said and she goes “Whatever”. I’m like “Whatever??? What are you now – 13?” to which she replied “am I bovvered???” Loll – I find myself torn between exasperation and laughing at how cute she looks when she’s being mischievous.

It’s like our roles have reversed. I am the one who’s correcting her English – it seems like the older she gets, the worse her English deteriorates. Has anyone noticed this with their parents? I think it’s because of the people she works with. She manages a lot of foreigners who don’t speak English that well.

I also find that her accent fluctuates. Sometimes she puts on this accent – and it feels like she is putting it on. There is a difference between switching it on and putting it on. Switching is more natural and is done unconsciously, it’s almost like you’re subconsciously mimicking the person you are speaking to but up to a certain point. I’ve more or less lost what Nigerian accent I had but when I go to Nigeria or speak to Nigerians, my accent deepens and you can hear a lot of the intonations. My Yoruba accent definitely improves when I’m in Nigeria.

Back to my mother, she sometimes puts on a British accent and it makes me want to cringe. I understand that she moved here in her 40s and I shouldn’t expect her accent to change but ahhhhh. I sometimes feel bad like I criticise too much or like … I don’t want to say like I’m ashamed or I look down on her cos I don’t, BUT I know that if it was anyone else, I would look down on them. I believe in people being natural or true to themselves. I never say anything about it or would never criticise her but I catch myself cringing and feel like if I’ve not really accepted her as she is, it shouldn’t bother me but it does.
Ok back to a light note – don’t know where all that came from.

Role Reversal.
Yes. Today, my mum was going to her exercise class – to my shame and her constant gloating, she’s much fitter, trimmer, smaller than I am. I have since surpassed the size she was when she was 9mths pregnant with me. However, she still persists in blaming me for her weight gain – some 25 years later! Anyways she’s off to her class (she’s walking there) and she’s wearing a skirt with footless tights – basically leggings. It’s quite fashionable – if you’re 16! Plus does the woman know it’s cold?!?!?!

Me – Mummy, you know you’re going to be cold dressed like that?
Mother – Oh! But I’m wearing my leggings!
Me – (looking at the patch of shin exposed above her trainers) Well you really don’t want to be exposing any skin in this weather.
Mother – Hmmm … do you think I should wear socks with this? You don’t think it will look weird?
Me - (thinking what??) I don’t know! I don’t care – as long as you’re warm what does it matter?
Mother – well it matters to me! I don’t want to look like some weirdo wearing socks and leggings on the street.
Me – Just wear some socks! Who are you trying to impress? Who cares what you look like? (Thinking you know what, just freeze! What’s my own? Loll)

(Btw – the leggings are really thick black ones which match her socks so it looks like she’s wearing tights. Why she couldn’t just wear tights I don’t know!)

Loll – I swear I feel like I’m the mother and she’s the child cos that’s the kind of thing she was saying to me a few years ago. Silly vain woman. Then again, the woman has had more boyfriends and dates in the last few years than I’ve had so she’s obviously doing something right. I shouldn’t really talk cos I’m the one who looks like a tramp/bag lady whenever I go to work. I soo don’t send! Lolll – I pick up the first thing I can find off the floor; but I clean up nicely ;-)

Anyways – ok I’m off to the shops. Have definitely done no work today. Have a nice night folks!